Houston I think we have landed....and there is NO problem!

So....here we at the end of day 3 in Angel Fire and I am just now sitting down....literally!  Just as a reminder to all....awesome takes energy!!  So far so good but oh so many moving parts.  We are in a house with fifteen people (5 adults and 10 kids).  It makes me realize that me and the girls are a pretty well oiled machine of three.  We move quickly, quietly and with very little discussion or drama....kind of like ninjas!  But we are adapting well and enjoying a great holiday!

Its NYE and the house is quiet...many are in bed already while the "girls" are up watching Pitch Perfect (a few of the boys of leering over the loft balcony watching as well but we don't want to offend their masculinity so we'll say is just the girls).  I think the year will roll out with very little pomp or circumstance.  I am not sure if its the energy required during the day, the fact we had a big fondue party last night, or perhaps at the core, NYE is just another day and when you are tired you are tired.  I don't need to see the ball drop or drink champagne or blow into a cheap paper horn....I haven't needed that for many years but certainly don't need it this year.  I am exactly where I want to be and feel exactly the way I want to feel on such a day.

Today was a perfect day on the slopes with Abby and Aidan--yesterday was a bit rough for little Aidan but she seemed to turn a corner and was awesome out on the slopes today.  She was happy, cheery and one tough cookie as we had near blizzard conditions with cold wind and wet snow but she was all smiles!  Abby just gets better and better on her snowboard and I have to admit I thoroughly enjoyed watching her "shred" up the mountain on her board!  She was amazingly patient and encouraging with her little sister and we all had a ton of fun on the mountain.   The mountain provided a torch parade and fireworks at the base that I took a group of kids down to watch.  It was bitter cold but we all focused on the experience and enjoyed every bit of it---it was something to see the ski school staff and ski patrol coming down the mountain with lit torches in each hand.  The fireworks were really amazing and lit up the whole sky.  The whole thing lasted less than an hour but was well worth it and made for a cool experience and fun memories.  We wrapped up the night with steak dinner, chocolate fountain and a white elephant gift exchange!  Big fun but all are WIPED OUT!

So...here I sit and type and think.  With a day like I had I could care less about midnight...its not midnight that makes the day...its the day and I had an amazing one and I'm all smiles. 

 

I was describing to a friend the other day....I have this sense that I have LANDED.  This new life I have created and written about is feeling more and more like it "fits".  As the year winds down, I look back at the beginning of the summer and had more "stuff" on my to-do list:  1)  Move 2) Fix job situation and 3) Get divorced.  I guess my dad did teach me to be a task master....because check, check and check!  Some days I don't really feel like I've accomplished all that much but that could just be my style...I mean really, if I look at the facts on paper...I have done quite a bit.  And now.....its done and I have "landed".  And with each month that passes, life just returns to a state of habits and styles...just new from what I once had but life just the same.  Routines and schedules have a way of returning and with them actually comes a bit of peace.  Peace in our daily activities but an immense amount of peace in my heart.

It makes me laugh how systematic I really am deep down inside.  Sure I try and pass off this spontaneous, fun loving impromptu gal...but really,  I am my father's daughter (with a tad more pizzazz!) This year was really a mission:  defined statement and objective, full (well mostly full) understanding of mission requirements and parameters (functional, operational and constraints), mission concepts and timeline, mission budgeting,  and mission execution.  So now I guess I would be in what you call mission evaluation.  How clinical?  How process oriented?  Is this really my life I am talking about?  What a geek!!  But maybe that's just it....life is a mission:  a constant cycle of these processes.

 

Perhaps 2013 will call for a little less evaluation, a little less stress about the planning or end results and more living.  My priorities for the year are merely consistency and stability--really pretty simple.  Day in and day out...do what I know is right for me and my girls.  We have some fun things planned together--Abby and I are going to NYC in May and will sing at Carnegie Hall, summer trip to Lake Tahoe, return trip to Tahoe in the fall for Ironman, and much more we don't even know of yet.  There are also events on their horizon that bring about a great deal of change so my job is to help prepare them for that as best I can--probable school change, their dad's wedding,  and much more we don't even know of yet.  ;-)  I really feel ready for it all--I mean really, what can't we handle? 

 

As for me, Just Jeanne, I have just begun to make my own mental list of what the year will or could be---right now too busy in the moment that is Angel Fire.  I feel content and don't really choose to think about much more.  I will upon my return to Fort Worth.....afterall, I do like having lists and goals but for now I think I'll just relax, drink a bit of Crown, watch the snow fall and smile.......because I've landed and all is fine. 

 

 

Hmmmm....start of something new is just around the corner. Again.

Life has been....well let's say interesting of late. I am getting ready to go on a week long ski vacation. Vacation always brings about some time for relaxing and reflection....couple that with a new year and I'm sure I'll blow some of the dust off this bad boy blog before I return home. I just logged in to see the current state of affairs and there is much dust to be blown.

Leaving in the early am....maybe the long car drive is just what I need to he things rev-ed up again. Ready...oh so ready for the new year!

Lessons from a rolling stone

I don't know what it is about vacation that brings on thinking time....maybe it's the disconnect from the routine or the downtime made available.  Regardless.....for me it does and so, here I am...two days left in California, and I can't overcome my desire to sit here and blog.  I also should point out to my Texas friends that I sit here, on the deck, in a sweatshirt and under a blanket--quite brisk this morning.  My room faces west (the ocean) so it is shaded from the morning sun.  The surf is the perfect soundtrack or background music for where my head and heart are this morning and there is a seagull lurking around the area...probably wondering what WE'RE having for breakfast.

I have spent the last five days with my family---the blood related group.  :-). I specify only because I take my other "family by choice" quite seriously.  Fortunately for me, I am crazy about both so this has been a good week.  I will say it took a bit for us to adjust to each others styles--when you see each other so infrequently it can be tough. After all, we all have a way of doing things and in true Sajben style, we of course think our own way is right....you can see the potential conflict here....but no major bumps and we're grooving along just fine now.  What's interesting to me is all of us were so looking forward to the trip....everything looked good on paper...and yet, small adjustments we're required.  I'm finding that to be very true lately.

Seems like a "no duh" kind of statement doesn't it.....what seems ideal on paper may not be....unless it feels good in your heart.  I started to think back on how many times I was in a situation, job or relationship that seemed ideal, all the parts seemed to fit together just right, it appeared to give me all that was needed and yet....something was not quite right.  Sometimes I come to that conclusion on my own....sometimes others come to it for me (when this happens I've noticed, it's  much more difficult for me because I'm not in control.  Sad...but true) .....either way, that momentum comes to an end and a different path is ferreted out and chosen.  The stone keeps on rolling.....

Each of my job changes fall into this category....every time I left a place of employment I was leaving a "good job".  Many people may have scratched their head and asked..."WHY would you leave such a great place?" or   "That would be my DREAM job"....and yet it was no longer right for me.

Or even bigger than jobs...what about reltionships or my marriage?  Ultimately, if a relationship comes to an end, its the result of something not feeling good in someone's heart.  Not to belittle the pain of divorce or a broken family (and believe me its still VERY much there for me) but how many times have you heard a story of the "ideal or perfect" family ( 2.2 kids, white picket fence, cute dog, etc) where things weren't so "perfect".  There is no perfect.  It's a constant effort of communicating and trying to understand, deliver and receive what feels good....in your heart.  You can rationalize the "paper" side (logic/brain/whatever):  "well this makes sense, this is what experts say will work, or this is acceptable by some pre-defined standard."  But if it ain't jiving in the heart area...the head ain't gonna win in the long haul.

Perhaps this is simply the definition of change.  Things change. Jobs change.  People change.  Or.....is it me?

Maybe I suffer a little attention deficit in my life---constantly looking for change or something new, different, or sparkly?  Rollin, rollin, rollin.......  Believe me, I've given this a lot of thought.  I want to believe that it is just part of the journey.  Change is rarely easy but sometimes necessary.  A rolling stone gathers no moss right?  However, this stone is actually ready to be a tad mossy.  Perhaps green is my color?

I am ready to be still.  That's actually quite a tall order for this "young" lady.  :-) Many of you many have even chuckled out loud at that.....my definition of "still" may need some work.  But I am ready...at least in my heart.  I am ready to focus on work, family, home and friends.  I have some work trips scheduled but really can't muster up much more "going" and "doing".  In the simplest
terms...I am tired.  Tired like I could go to bed tomorrow and wake up next year.....good and mossy!

I am tired or trying to figure out what looks good on paper, I am tired of trying to figure out what is "suppose" to happen next, I am tired of trying to BE on the next square of the game when I am not ready.  My dear friend, John Gustafson told me yesterday "Just Chill.....".  It hit me square in the eyes as truth...and to the best of my ability, it's EXACTLY what I am going to do (or at least try) to do.

Moss is cool........right?

Its Panda time!

Well....I guess its Panda time again!  Time to embrace the awesomeness that is my life.  Up, down, in, out, high, low.....I feel like I’ve lived a life of opposites in the last couple of months.  I have put TONS of energy into making positive changes that are good for Jeanne--and many times its tough because its come at the expense of what others think I “should” do which always feels contrary to my inner pleaser, but it had to be done.

Lots of change.....yes, more!  Like who thought that was even possible...but it is!  And all pretty big so I can’t even start at the top...so I guess I’ll go in chronological order!

I made a huge change in my employment which feels awesome!  I left Playtri on June 10th after the close of the Las Vegas camp and could NOT be happier.  I have been part of Playtri since 2005 so you can imagine this was not a decision made lightly but one very much driven by my gut and what I knew to be right.  The environment in simplest terms was no longer good for Jeanne---so I left.  I remember walking out the door and wondering......shit, what the hell am I going to do now?  I had no plan....just knew I didn’t want to stay there one more day.  Sure there are a lot of details about this and that, but no point in recounting them here.  The funny thing is my long time business partner, Ahmed, keeps asking me when I am coming back.....and while I am one to never say never......probably not going to happen anytime soon....in this lifetime.....just sayin’.  I wish them nothing but the best and hope they find the happiness they feel they are pursuing on the path they are on....just wasn’t my path anymore.  No accidents.

Well, God works in wonderful ways and within a couple of days I had many options, offers, ideas and plans.  I had the opportunity to continue to redesign my life the way that was driven by my values and ideals--not anyone else’s. I have a couple of different hats to wear and they all fit together great.  I still get to coach and have a fantastic group of clients I am privileged to work with!  I value them beyond measure and am excited to work with them and watch each of them reach their goals and enjoy the journey along the way!  I still get to produce training camps--which was always my favorite job of all.  I will be producing triathlon training camps under the Trident Sports umbrella.  Trident Sports is a Fort Worth based triathlong training, racing and coaching organization.  Its less than 5 miles from my house!!  We have four camps on the books for 2012-2013:  Austin in September, Hawaii in February, Possum Kingdom Lake in June and Lake Tahoe in late July/early August.  We will launch website and registration July 1 so stay tuned.  The folks at Trident have been AMAZING to me and I am excited to be a part of their team.  They have successfully captured an essence of triathlon that was missing for me:  fun and family focused!!  I am excited to join their family, change the color of my jersey and see if I can continue to touch people’s lives!  No accidents. 

I also picked up an outside sales rep job on a part time basis with an agency called Tech Line Rep Group.  Jeremy Muelman, the agency owner, and I have known each other for several years.  I saw him at a tri event in the early spring and we began discussing the opportunity.  I wanted something that provided some extra income, put me back in sales, but still gave me time to run a training company and produce camps.  God is good as I now get to do it all......and be there to tuck my kids in, pick them up from school, and continue to touch the lives that are most important to me:  Aidan and Abby!  Too much was left up to a nanny for too long.  I enjoy being with my kids and want to optimize that as much as possible at all times!  

I started with Techline Rep Group on June 11th (yes, the day after I got home from Vegas) and am selling Cervelo/Focus bicycles, Haro/Masi bicycles, Zoot, Easton, Giro, Bell, Blackburn Speedplay, Ogio bags, and Go Pro Action cameras.  Its a fantastic line.  Jeremy and Mendy are fantastic people.  It fits perfect with what I have going and I fell blessed with the opportunity.  No accidents!

I also moved into a new house on June 5th (yes the day BEFORE the Vegas camp)!  I love, love, love my new house.  I haven’t had a whole lot of time to unpack but it will come.  Look for house warming party sometime in July I guess.......still have boxes to go through!  I have had so much fun making my new “nest”.  Its mine and the girls....so I suspect it might get more and more girly as we go along, but its ours, its small, and I love it.  Please come visit!  Dodge is a little confused by the change and wondering why he doesn’t have a whole lot of room to move around but he’ll adjust.  

Finally, if all goes according to crazy plans, I will be divorced tomorrow.  I realized today on the flight home from a Cervelo sales meeting, it will be exactly twenty-three years after our first date---to the day!  Accident.....who knows?  The entire process has been confusing and expensive to me.  It seems to me others can move on with their lives easier than I.  I desire a piece of paper that says, I am once again single.  I have no expectations that with that piece of paper comes some sort of magical, numbing medication, but its a start.  Or, an official end to what was but is no more.  Its hard to type these kinds of things without a few lump in my throat and tears in my eyes.  In the end, we broke it.  I broke it.  Dan broke it.  It got broken.  I hate it for the girls.  I hate it for Dan and I.  Reconciliation was not possible due to players in the game which to me makes it even sadder but again, we both played our roles.  I don’t know what lies ahead for me, or for Dan for that matter.  The highs and lows probably won’t subside anytime soon....but maybe their presence is what makes life what it is.  Afterall, isn’t a roller coaster more fun than a flat road?  Gotta take all the undulations to make the ride interesting.  We’ll see......I know (and have heard) from many who have navigated this process, I still have much to learn.  I tell you all what....let me learn it.  You can’t protect me from future lessons learned.  I gotta learn them...but believe me, I’ve learned plenty and am open to learning more each day.  No accidents.

So....new job, new house, new Facebook status....all in literally one month! Phew!!  What do you think about all that?  Well, know that I believe these things......in the words of Christopher Robin.... I will always remember I am braver than I believe, stronger than I seem and smarter than I think.  I am going to be just fine......and, look out.....maybe even a little bit BETTER!!

SKA-DOOOOSSSSHHHHHHH!!!

The Hills are Alive........

I love music. I love every aspect of it. I love singing it. I love playing it and I love listening to it. On my profile you may note that under musical likes, I've listed the kind with notes in it. Because I love it all!

Last night I had the honor and privilege to attend my friend Hans Grim's Senior Graduation Concert at Texas Weslyan University. What an amazing compilation of pieces (from The Beatles, to Mozart, to "William" Joel (yes, Billie...guess he's going formal)) and talent. Hans played piano, sang (didn't know he had such a voice), a full sized choir joined in, a barber shop quartet, a tuba player, an oboe solo and a brass/wind ensemble! It was amazing!

I was entertained but more importantly I was impressed. In so many ways, this event WAS Hans' Ironman only possibly better. He had prepared his entire life for this event. Maybe the exact logistics were within the last year but the influences music has had on him began when he was very young. Each piece was picked from parts of his journey. He had trained, and trained and trained and it all came together in a beautiful way. As a coach, I guess you could say, "he executed his race strategy with perfection!" I am so very happy for him.

Three songs really moved me in the concert and I woke up thinking about them. I guess I enjoy the expressions in music because the song writers do a far better job than I could putting certain emotions or thoughts into words and song. Maybe I am just corny that way, but I can lose myself in a song if the lyrics are poignant and meaningful to something going on in my life at that particular moment. Truly beautiful music is not only heard but felt and when the singer/songwriter can convey those emotions through the music or performance, it has significant impact. I have some friends, of late, who probably don't understand one ounce of that concept.....I even find myself hesitant to type it because maybe it does sound kind of weird, but I realize more and more every day...maybe I am to. I like what I like, I know what makes me happy, and honestly, I just don't give a shit anymore what other people think about me. So....la la la....back to my music. :)

One song was "Like a Breeze Off the River" from The Full Monty broadway musical. Its a song about a father who often stands in awe and amazement of his son and the gift he is to him. It was beautifully preformed and I looked up the lyrics to understand it more. I think any parent might feel touched by the thoughts included in this song as I did. What did we do to be so lucky to have such amazing little creatures entrusted to us? How is it possible to love someone THAT much--to the point it hurts? I am continually impressed with my kids (as I hope most mothers are) and take very seriously my role in their lives. Its been a bumpy road of late but we're all in it together and everyday I feel so blessed to have them. The final verse in the song really got me--about how even on the darkest days, you have a guaranteed light.

Like the breeze off the river
Every time I see your face
And it's strange but familiar
Like a map of a better place

And sometimes I feel like I live in a shadow
And shadow's all I see
Then you jump straight up
And you grab the moon
And you make it shine on me
Where do you get it from?

Everybody knows the secret
Well I don't and I never did
I don't know any secret
All I know is I love you kid
All I know is I love you kid
All I know...

The second song was a church hymn based on John 14:1. Yes....I know my bible verses, I just don't let on that often. "Do not let your heart be troubled. Believe in God. Believe also in Me." The timing of that remembrance yesterday was pretty key. Funny....how that happens.....you hear what you need to in the almost exact moment you need it. I have enjoyed my journey back to God over the past year but still have a long way to go (don't we all?) but am reminded that also, in the darkest times, there is another light. Or perhaps the one from my children comes from God. Hmmmm........now there is a thought. The church I go to lately is structured very differently from the classic Catholic mass I grew up with. It relies very heavily on music and perhaps a key reason I feel so good when I go. The lighting is fairly dim and I sit (in the same place every time I go, which has been awhile lately) and lose myself in thought and the meaning of the songs. I feel grounded and connected to what matters when I leave so I keep going back. People ask a lot....."what ARE you"? Meaning Catholic, Protestant, etc.........I still don't know how to answer that and on some level, hope I never do. I AM human. I am a follower of God. Don't really want to put any other "flavor" on it. Right or wrong.......the label doesn't match the music.

Finally, the song that hit me the most was ironically the show opener. Hans' son walked out onto the stage and sang an a capella version of Blackbird, by the Beatles. I have always loved this song but its been so long since I've heard it, it too was a remembrance. When is the right moment to arise? Its almost like the bird was waiting for permission.....direction.....orders to go do what its wanted all its life. Do we do that? Wait until someone tells us to go do that very thing we've been waiting for? Have I been doing that? Really?

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these sunken eyes and learn to see
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to be free

Blackbird fly, blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night

Blackbird fly, blackbird fly
Into the light of the dark black night

Blackbird singing in the dead of night
Take these broken wings and learn to fly
All your life
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise
You were only waiting for this moment to arise

I look back over the past year and while I feel I have made so much improvement in things I can still identify that waiting. Waiting for someone to tell me to fly. Ugh.....time to launch. I saw old behaviors in new friendships---as expressed earlier in regard to music. While I understand its not everyone's thing, at least respect its my thing. Its hard when you share something personal with someone and they dismiss it as unimportant. I had that happen recently, right around the start of lent, and it didn't feel good. It made me look at the person completely differently and remember, I get to decide what makes Jeanne happy--not just a local resident jackass. But perhaps thats a blog for another day....... ha! Back to the music.

As many of you may know, I sang in a concert under the direction of Betty Buckley last March. I have been invited to join her again for her next concert in June. I am seriously struggling with the decision. I really don't have the time--I need to focus on finalizing the divorce, moving, WORK, training for IM, getting girls set up for the summer and the transition to their Dad's move. I don't have the money for the class. All signs, signals and warnings say nope, this is not the time for that. But my heart wants to sing.....my heart wants to be part of something that beautiful again. Class starts next Wednesday.......so there's still time to think. I welcome any input. :-)

So, there are some thoughts on music. God bless the music makers and their gift to our world! Thank you Hans for a beautiful night! The hills be alive with the sound of music..........hmmmmm, maybe it isn't an accident my Ironman is in Austria. Me and the Von Trapp family........

I'm baaaaccckkk

But the question is....where did I really go? I have been saying for weeks and weeks...I need to update my blog....but saying and doing, as we all know, can be a very big difference.

Its always interesting to me as I watch what people say.....versus what they do. Talk is cheap and after awhile it gets so very old. But sadly, I too am human and often times, I am guilty of saying more than I am willing to do. I don't necessarily like that part of myself and have made it a goal for the year to get it all lined up; my actions and my words. I am pretty happy to report, so far so good (for the most part).

For example---I set out on the advent of this blog by SAYING: I will be more consistent with my training and my workouts. Am I DOING it? YES! My training is going so well its almost shocking. Well...not really when I think about it. I have a coach who knows more about triathlon and health than anyone I know. He has coached me for seven (7) years and knows all my strengths and weaknesses and works with them. He has devised a plan for my goals that I am following with more consistency than recent months. Why am I so shocked I am getting better, stronger, faster? (oooh....I almost sound like the Bionic Woman there....)

I spend a fair amount of time on my bike and while many of you know, I am not all that crazy about the bike, I am focused on getting those workouts in. I have even added to the fun by recruiting non-triathlon friends into the fold and have enjoyed many a bike ride with them. I even ventured out last night with the Fort Worth Night Riders on a 10-mile social ride. I know this isn't part of my "training" and I don't substitute one for the other but it is helping develop a "love of the bike" so I see it as all good.

My running feels stupid good. Yes, that's right, stupid good! I ran the Cowtown Half Marathon on Sunday (well, 11 miles of it) with a friend and client, John Gustafson. Overall he is a better athlete than I and I have to admit, as I was waiting at mile two for him to join me, I questioned my sanity of what I was about to do. After all, with all the respiratory issues I had in the fall, I hadn't really run much---and certainly not out in the cold. For some reason, on Sunday morning, I didn't care. I wanted a good run. I wanted to push myself. I wanted to run with my friend. So......I said..... F it! I got up, after 4 hours of sleep, and headed to W 7th street and waited. The first mile my head felt so dizzy. The pace felt faster than anything I had done in awhile that my body needed a remembrance that it could run that fast. My head wanted to talk me out of a lot--I was too tired, too out of shape, didn't eat right the night before, hadn't trained for the distance....blah blah blah. But.....my inner runner, the one that navigated me through many a marathon, that took me to Boston, that had forgotten how much I loved morning running took over. Her voice became louder than any and I started to have a blast with it. I relaxed, my heart rate came WAY down, and I just started to move. I felt strong and powerful.....and knew this distance (or anything longer that is coming in July) isn't going to beat me. It was the BEST workout I have had in months and I am so thankful to my friend for being the reason it happened. I probably should tell him that...huh? Next time I see him.....

Work has picked up quite a bit as well and that is as important, if not more so, than my training. Somehow they go hand in hand....when one is good, so is the other. I find myself highly motivated but often a bit overwhelmed by all that is going on. I have to find peace in the blessings and not let them get the better of me. Someone shared with me today....Faith is stronger than Fear. I believe I will be using that a great deal in the next few months as I continue down the road. There is so much potential in this beautiful career of mine...I just have to go out and develop it and make the most of it. I need a boost in the "DO" area of this aspect of my life.

Personally, life is good. That feels so good to write. Not every day is perfect but I've come to find out, it really doesn't need to be. I still have a handful of folks telling me how I am going to feel, how I am suppose to feel, what I will feel, what I shouldn't feel, etc. I respect them for caring but trust in the advice and counsel of few because in the end, its really for me to figure out. I had this HUGE epiphany on Sunday (in between the miracle run and the Night Riders) that reminded me I am exactly where I am suppose to be. I am SAYING all that needs to be said and I am DOING all that I can do. Is there more I can do? Maybe....or maybe figure out ways to DO IT differently but I determine that...no one else and that feels pretty darn good.

So---here's to hoping I don't let another 7 weeks go by before I update this blog--I enjoy it far to much. I guess in the meantime, I just had a lot to SAY and to DO.

Oh Happy Day

Full of happy days--not bad for the first week back to reality!

It has been an awesome week full of happy days! I love being busy as long as I have scheduled time to recover (which happens to be coming tomorrow)!! But this week was full of great training, great business, great time with family and some good time with some old friends!

Monday, while much of the world enjoyed an official holiday, I went back to work. No time like the present to dive in all I had left behind. While at the center I heard many a "hey stranger, where have you been" or "Hi Jeanne...long time no see" Yikes! Had I been away that long? Yes, actually I had. It is nice to be missed but probably not the best thing for business. I took my time, I managed the things that were required but am now set on 2012. And it is ON! (go ahead...say it.....Like Donkey Kong!) I am more engaged and excited about my business, the camps, my clients progressions, my own progression, etc. than I have been in awhile and it is the fuel that drives most activity.

This momentum kept up all week and while many question my drive back and forth to Dallas, I have no problems with it. Between pod casts, books on tape, phone conversations with friends and family--the time passes quickly. You never know, if you are reading this, I may just call YOU on a drive home. ;-)

The other fuel that drives activity are the girls. Abby celebrated her 14th birthday in style this week. We had a ball! Her lifelong friends (and they are literally life long--they have been friends since they were 2) kidnapped her and took her to iHop for breakfast. You would think after all these years, it wouldn't be a surprise but it is. I guess, really, anytime 5-6 people stand at your bed, at 6am and start blaring out Happy Birthday to You at the top of their lungs, it would be a surprise. What an alarm clock!! She went out to dinner with her dad for a birthday dinner the night of her birthday, and took 6 close friends out for bowling, pizza and then home for home made ice cream sundaes the day after. Tonight, she and another BFF (who now goes to a different school) had a celebration over dinner.

The girl is well celebrated!! And so happy!! Its great to see her effervescent smile light up her face and her bubbly, peppy attitude creep into the things we do. Its quite a change from March but one I welcome and feel very, very happy about! I will enjoy it while I can...afterall, she is now 14. Who knows how long it might last?!?

Other events that contributed to happy week include making galuska for Aidan's heritage project. Apparently they were a big hit amongst her class mates. Aidan also got to present her science project as Dr. Clever Smartzen in school--I will have to post her pic in lab coat and Einstein wig! She giggled as she walked her friends through the scientific method to determine whether or not you can hum while someone pinches your nose. (If you are wondering, no you cannot). :-)

I got to have dinner with an old friend in Dallas Monday night which is always fun. We committed to making it a more regular thing. I saw a movie Thursday night with my own BFF--we were long overdue for some girl time and I put all my Christmas decorations away!

Three final choices that contribute to my sense of happy relate to commitments I have made over the next few months: 1) with church 2) with yoga and 3) with my book club. I will elaborate more on each of these in future posts but they are all geared to the new year and fresh starts. Each commitment is to myself, with the help of structure provided elsewhere and I am extremely optimistic of what may come on the other side.

So, while no real monumental events took place, everything felt good and contributed to my happy. Beth, a pastor at church, talked about a mentor of hers who kept a "happy folder"--a folder full of brief remembrances of times where all was good: blessings apparent, feelings of self strong, good things happening around you, and generally a positive spirit in the air. This week was a week full of things for a happy folder.....maybe I'll start one.